When a Place Stops Feeling Safe

I am struggling to be in Laos right now. I’ve just had food poisoning and now an infected lip — straight after, not fun. Navigating getting the help I need is super tricky. I was looking for the medication I needed at the mini-mart and couldn’t find anything. I asked for help, and a very emotionally detached person said, “We don’t have.” I asked if there was a 24/7 pharmacy; he said, “Don’t have.” Well, it turns out you can go to the hospital pharmacy in town, but no one’s going to go out of their way to help. It’s late at night, 2 a.m., and I don’t know what to do. I’m just sitting on the apartment steps in a lot of pain.

A girl comes up, possibly afraid of me because I’m a foreigner. I ask on Translate; she says, “Don’t know,” and quickly moves away. I see a Lao woman in heels, looking busy, showing importance — yeah, good luck asking her for help. I’m on my own here, and it’s kind of scary. This isn’t the most overtly helpful culture, and I’m really struggling with that.

It seems to come from the top. Here’s an excerpt from Vientiane Times: Laos has uncovered widespread corruption cases nationwide over the past five years, identifying 334 individuals implicated in financial misconduct between 2021 and 2025, with total losses exceeding LAK 642.93 billion (nearly USD 30 million), alongside significant losses in multiple foreign currencies. There seems to be a really oppressed population here and a culture in official positions of image, face, and control.

Now I see this while I’m having trouble, and just across the border in Thailand, two newborn babies were found in dumpsters. I struggled to process that, as I see patterns in neglect, including the four-year-old screaming for attention from her mother while she ignored her. People say, “Oh, it’s different; this is probably how her mum did it,” but I still think it’s bullshit. Nevertheless, it’s abuse and neglect.

I have about eight days left here. I don’t feel comfortable anymore — I’m ready to leave. The education gap is too big, and the emotional gap is suffocating me.

I love to write from insight. If you enjoy this, subscribing — free or paid — helps me stay on this path. I’m grateful for anyone who joins along. Sometimes it gets lonely, and sometimes I need help.